In Case You Had Hope... I'm Here to Destroy It
Yes, our worst horror has come true (no, not Trump as President, but that is a close second... and if you disagree with me, feel free to keep your mouth shut)... The Emoji Movie is still happening. Yes, this visual feast of actual turd is happening and nobody had the brains to stop it.
When you ask yourself, "self... what kind of god damn monster would green light a movie with such a horrible premise," using Emojis as characters ("OH. MY. GOD. It's now, it's hip, the kids will relate to it... HASHTAG RELATABLE!!!" - the person who probably pitched the film)... it's still happening and somehow they conned T.J. Miller and the otherwise fantastic piece of humanity James Corden into this fecal festival of animated terror.
So when you think to yourself... "self, I have a feeling 2017 might actually be better than 2016! It has to be, right?" Abandon all hope. We're doomed. Here's the teaser trailer. Please don't hang yourselves after watching.
Twerking Ice Cream Cone. Velociraptor. 5 Time Squirrel Herding Champion. Super Hero.